Random Ruminations

Ruminations, random thoughts, little things that have popped up in my head this week...

• I now get lots of mail, but it’s all medical related. Lame.
• Patient intake paperwork is mailed now because of Covid. I spent 1 hour filling out paperwork for 2 locations. How/why did we do this in person before?
• All the forms say list “referring doctor.” Uh, which doctor? I literally saw 3 at the mammography center and there’s my PCP. Then there’s “who can we receive/share info?” All of them? Aren’t they going to loop you in anyway??
• I’ve never watched my medical claims more closely than I do now and rooting to hit my deductible (already met after the mammograms and biopsies)
• I’ve never had such a close encounter of health vs money. How do people pay for this with bad insurance? I’ve hit my deductible and am 73% through my coinsurance and my MRI isn’t even processed yet. 
• I’m really glad this happened early in the year and not late to maximize my deductible and coinsurance time.
• I was going to save my stimulus check for travel to England next year, but guess the Gov will help me pay a medical bill (yes, “a” bill...blah). 
• Spending money you saved not on fun things is lame...
• I’m trying not to worry that I won’t be able to travel next June to England. I feel like the trip is cursed...
• Actually, I’m worried I won’t be able to go to the Breeders’ Cup in Nov! Is live horse racing able to be part of my treatment plan?
• I might qualify for the Covid vaccine now (or sooner) because of my treatment.
• When do I get the vaccine, though?
• I giggled reading the breast reconstruction brochure about the different options. One option for filling can take abdomen fat/muscle. A benefit is you get a flatter stomach. In terms of shape, there’s a teardrop one (more natural), but has the possibility of rotating and then looking weird. Haha
• Is my housemate going to have to treat the house like Covid cleaning regimen again if I go through chemo? I feel like this past year has been the worst time to have a housemate in a 2 bedroom apt...
• Am I going to be able to use my new rower much this year? (Not that an elliptical would have been much better)
• When people ask me how I’m doing or what’s been happening recently, I realize how much it’s an automatic thing to ask. They might genuinely want to know, but 9/10 I am not going to dump what’s REALLY happening on to those people. People want happy, not sad. 
• My car battery died a solid death. It was 4 years old so it’s possible it would have died in the next year anyway, but barely driving it in a year definitely accelerated its death. Chris picked a battery that can take not driving it a lot because it’s possible I’m not driving my car more this year than I did last year. 
• Chris got the most amazing jump start battery! We tried to jump my car with another car with cables (Chris says they weren’t the cheapest ones) and no go (not enough to turn it over). He gets this battery and..30 seconds and BAM. Starts on first try every time. It’s pretty small too. It’s amazing! 5/5 highly recommend
• I’ve been eating like I don’t care. At some point I’ll have to go back to eating healthier either because I have to or because I should, but it’s a little bit of “YOLO” right now.
• How many cookies from My Cookie Dealer is it “acceptable” to have frozen before it’s a problem? Haha I don’t have any frozen now, but every restock I want to buy cookies...It’s bad. 
• I’m looking at my nail polish rack and wondering if I’ll be able to continue to paint my nails if I go through chemo/radiation (from an energy level). I guess a plus in this is it’s on my left side so I might save my right, dominate, arm/hand in the long run for painting. 
• Guess it’s a good thing I signed up for extra life insurance through work last year. I wouldn’t qualify for it now. 
• Drug commercial is all “do not take if you’ve had cancer.” Oh, well, guess that means me now. Weird. 
• Thing to look forward to regardless of what happens: BreyerFest! I signed up in January, but it’s in July. I might have to evaluate how many horses I actually get this time because, well, money needs have changed, but it’ll be something to look forward to and it’s all virtual. 
• I can’t wait till my consults next week are completed. I’ll have a better idea of where and what 2021 is going and will look like. Better idea of what to research and look into. 
• Monterey County is moving to red for Covid phase. We’ve been in purple or at the strictest level since the beginning. I feel like the world is opening up and I won’t get to enjoy it for long! Also, what does red even look like? Haha It’s like I’ve forgotten what indoor dining is...